Hye Assalamualaikum,
I just finished reading this book Change or lose by Prof Dr Abdul Karrim Bakar. It is a book that simply focusing on ways to change ourselves positively and for betterment in accordance to our reason of existence to worship Allah. It is true that, change is never an easy thing to do especially when you broken inside. It really needs deep insight and vision as much as will determination. Getting off a comfort zone involves emotional baggage; guilt, regret, fear, inner-critism and ptsd. When I read this book, I realized that, TO REALLY change ourselves we need to understand the inner part why we want to change. VISION. We want to change because of someone ? Because we want to prove that we can be better from other people ? Because of ourselves ? Or because of the sake of Allah.
Whatever it is, we need to know that we can’t achieve all what we want and desire. There’s must be a reason why all the things happened in the life. It is because of Allah’s will and Allah never make any mistake. We need to be willing to lose if we really want to change our life for the better. Shift to the new environment and let go of the old environment can actually works. It is important to realize that in reality, the environment makes up the circumstances that we work in. Working on providing good circumstances that help bring about change is actually a way to live in new environment.
In the past few years, I live in the environment that make me suffer. I started questioning about my self-worth and hate myself for being me. I keep all the pain inside and never told anyone about that. I keep finding myself and it really hard to endure it alone, this is the part I started to self-introspection myself… knowing my own strengths and weakness to overcome any failure. I finally left and find place that embrace me more which is myself. I live because of myself and not for anyone. Give pleasure to myself is the most important thing cause nothing is permanent except Allah. In the end, I only have myself.
Some people would give advice such as “just tell about what you feel”… but little did they know it is really hard cause I don’t want to react cause I don’t know how to say it. HAHAHA this reminds me of Caligula Roma Emperor “When Caligula finds out what happened to the rest of his family, his mothers, his brothers, he doesn’t react. He has no emotional reaction. He had simply learned that to react poorly was almost certainly to bring some kind of punishment down on him whether that was exile, imprisonment, or execution.” Done about my story.
Continue about the book —
“The vision of change can be complicated and huge, but can also be clear and easy”. In order for change to succeed, it may need the following:
- Solid will and determination
- A clear vision for the new status quo that we are working toward
- Circumstances can help us gain success in reaching what we aspire to
- A good understanding of the high cost and huge burden that we will carry when we choose to stay static and leave everything as it is
P/S: What a great book to read and I actually did various reflections throughout reading this book.
Are you the type of person who just follow the flow? Let time decided, let other people make decision for you?
OR
Are you the type of person who love to reflect upon the test, trials and tribulations in order to upgrade your level of faith?
You choose, or you lose
